Father's Day / Summer Solstice

  Today felt pretty strange for me. My very first Father's Day without my dad around and there have been tons of mixed emotions. I'm definitely sad, don't get me wrong, but there's a part of me that feels so at peace. When my dad was ill with cancer he was at the very worst i've ever seen him. Of course I miss him and wish more than anything that I had my dad still, but with what the circumstances were i'm so relieved that he's not hurting anymore.

   Today was pretty laid back, there's not really much you can do when the person you're supposed to be celebrating for isn't even here. But my immediate family was never really that big on huge celebrations for events, everything's always kinda been pretty calm with this type of stuff. My sister, Emily, came in from Brooklyn and her, my mom, my brother Taylor and I visited my dad at his grave. Being that my dad was in the navy when he was younger, he's buried at Calverton, a cemetary used to bury those who have served. It's definitely a weird feeling visiting a grave and knowing that you're standing before their body but not their soul. Being there and seeing so many other families, spouses, and friends gathered infront of their loves one's graves for the same exact reason I was there made me feel not so alone anymore. 

   To lighten up the situation, today's the summer solstice! Today has been my favorite day throughout my teenage years. I used to make huge countdown posters and cross off a day as June 21st came closer. Also, I used to be very into astrology and the alignment of the planets and stars with our minds which definitely added to the craze. Hate to break it to ya, but astrology's all kinda just one big hoax. But it's still fun to read up on it!

   There's something about summer that has always enlightened me so much. I've always loved the beach, but I don't need it to be summer to go. I'll sit in front of the ocean in just about any temperate or month or season. Dating a surfer has brought a lot of excitement to my beach trips. To me, summer is all about growth. I feel so much energy and radiation of great things this time of year. The summer solstice has always been so special to me for the reason that it feels like a fresh start or kinda like a new beginning. It's a day that begins a few months full of self growth and brightness within. 

   Switching back to the Father's Day topic, for those of you who are fortunate to have dads around and active in your lives, please thank them more than just one day a year. Parents do so much for their children and i've definitely realized that throughout this year. 

   In tribute to my dad, there are some pictures of him below (he was a hunk!!!). He was a really really cool guy with a lot of exceptionally impressive talents. From history, to art, to even math, he was always able to answer a question correctly. He honestly would've done incredible on one of those TV questionnaire game shows. I am always missing him and thinking about what could've been. Here's to all of the great dads out there, both alive and deceased. And also, here's to bright new beginnings.